LJ Idol: Path is Made by Walking

[drippedonpaper]

My life doesn't follow any particular formula. I used to think that lack of a formula made me special and unique. As I grow up and finally look more closely at others, I have realized that we all have special and unique lives.

Those who seem to live a formula are also having individual experiences. Our brains are exciting and scary places. Some people love sequential lives.

Once you get into your forties (if not sooner), you see formulas start to fail. It's no holds barred on all the ways that all of us can vary from what we thought our lives would be. Some of us have been at the same job for over a decade. Some of us are still bouncing around, looking for variety, for fit, or the holy grail of a job that actually provides affordable health insurance in addition to a salary. And if we don't have it, hey, do you have any leads on that? They say ask everyone and though the question gets old, it's tempting. It's gotten to the point that people will actually switch grocery lines if I ask them if they know anyone whose hiring. How aggressive is too aggressive? People say "be a real go getter," but apparently "be a go getter, but not that like that."

I think I live my life on the path of "I said it, but seriously, not like that Maria." Ok. Ok, I'm good. Not like that. I can believe it. But I'm so tired of putting the path where you told my to put my path. I don't want to be a good path neighbor and edge my borders with HOA approved plants that don't clash with you, your path, or what you believe is seasonally appropriate.

I'm me, baby, like it or lump it. And if you lump it, feel free to have your path meander away from mine. I don't have to always be the one adding curves and going the hard way just because you don't like the kind of gravel I lay on my path. I don't care.

You do your thing, I'll do mine. The paths I want near mine are those who want to be there. Let me say it again, yes, join me on my journey all you want, but please know I am not going to block any and all exit ramps. You decide to take an exit ramp, I will even make you a cake, throw a party, and wish you well. Go happy and travel in whatever way you feel is most fun!

Time is too short. Life is too short. I love being with you, but when I start to drag you down or we are walking out of step, you can leave with my blessing.

I will even miss you, but I love you. And I only want your good. I want your journey to be amazing. I'd love to be part of that amazing, but if I'm not, please leave me behind. I never want to drag you down on your journey.

As I age, I'm the fan of all happiness and amazement. And if I can't be part of your life, your gathering or your journey, I'm still going to be cheering you on. Loudly and happily. Even if your path is diverging from mine.

I want my path to be a path of love. And if that radiates out into your path and your journey, I'm glad. And if you're too far away, let me pull out my confetti gun and shoot some love at you.

Life's too short not to celebrate the fact that I can leave. Feel free to join my path, but just know, there are random dance parties. Not quite mandatory, but feel free to move over, make room or bust a move that I can copy.

Life's a dance and if I slip on the gravel a bit, at least maybe I gave you a laugh!

Comments

[roina_arwen]

Some paths require fancy footwork to navigate, but they're usually the most fun. :)

[muchtooarrogant]

"Once you get into your forties (if not sooner), you see formulas start to fail."

This is so interesting. I guess it depends on what formulas you mean, but for me some of the big ones would be getting married, having/raising kids, career path, etc. I blew up the expected formula when I was in my twenties and quit college to start my own business, and boy was my dad pissed. LOL By the time I had reached my mid-thirties/forties though, those formulas had reasserted themselves in my life.

"It's gotten to the point that people will actually switch grocery lines if I ask them if they know anyone whose hiring."

Wow, that's pretty craptastic of them! From my perspective, you're doing exactly the right thing. Reach out, make connections, network. If people can't even empathize and engage enough to say, "No, I'm sorry I don't," then switching lines is probably the best thing they could do for both of you.

I liked your overall tone, and this was very thought provoking, thanks!

Dan

[erulissedances]

I like your path, but am missing the music of celebration that would make walking it a bit easier. But a dance? Oh yes, definitely a dance.

- Erulisse (one L)

[bleodswean]

Thanks for this upbeat and provocative response to the prompt!

[tonithegreat]

Ah, the mid life crisis. I feel like a lot of people in our society of today are over-achievers who have that breakdown a bit earlier than the early forties. But it’s hard to plot a straightforward path through a minefield! Better to dance between the destinations, as you say. And maybe try to do a little clean up along the way as we go so that those who come after us have a few fewer mines to try to avoid.

[adoptedwriter]

So many truths in this!

[inkstainedfingertips]

There is so much here I can relate to, and I love how you express these ideas. Thank you for sharing this.

[static_abyss]

This is such a great attitude to have. Sign me up for the dance parties!

[fausts_dream]

I dig it, best laid plans of mice and men, wanna make God laugh, tell him your plans.

We improvise, we adapt, we dance. Good entry.

[mollywheezy]

I definitely relate to your non-formula following "like it or lump it" attitude. I especially loved your last line! ;)

[murielle]

We can all benefit from a deep examination of where we've been, where we're going, and how we plan to get there and travelling joyfully and lovingly and independently is a wonderful path to walk no matter where we go. 😊.

[halfshellvenus]

I like the sentiment in this, and the sense of fun at the end! Random dance parties make that sound like path a lot of people would enjoy being on!

[xeena]

I love this and totally agree with you. I've always said if the world was gonna end in 24hrs I'd want to have a party so I could enjoy myself one last time.

[rayaso]

"I'm me, baby, like it or lump it" - this was a stellar paragraph. This was an excellent personal manifesto, and the ending nailed it.

[erulissedances]

I liked this writing, and I'm sorry to see you go. Thank you for your sacrifice, however. It's a VERY busy week upcoming for me and I might have to BYE, which wouldn't be an option if I had a write-off.

- Erulisse (one L)